I'm too old to be single.

So Kimba's got a boyfriend. That's nothing new--she's had pretty steady relationships for the last 3-5 years at least. In fact, she's only had two different boyfriends in all that time. Her current boyfriend's name is Jason. On the extremely rare occasions that he and my brother are in the same room, it gets a little confusing.

Anna started seeing this one guy from her forensic biology class by the name of Tim. Kayla and I call him Twigg, or Twiggler (his last name, or a play on it), since we know too many Tims already.

Then there's me. I haven't had a date that was anything more than platonic in so long a time that it can be measured in years. The last date I had that was even remotely romance-based (read: there was actual kissing and stuff, not just friendly chat) was . . . I don't remember exactly how long ago, but it was with Patrick W, before he went to Vermont on that trip with his local YSA group.

Given this information, imagine my surprise when Anna, the youngest of my two younger sisters, came into the camper this evening waving the black diamond solitaire on her hand. It's interesting, I never knew black diamonds weren't actually black. Anna's is actually a dark purple color. But the ring really suits her.

Yes, my friends, my twenty-year-old sister is getting married--in February. Don't get me wrong, I like Twiggler--he's funny, and makes Anna happy. I was just surprised that Kimba wasn't the one to get engaged first (since I'm nowhere near that stage with any guy I know and Kimba's the next oldest, at twenty-three--twenty-four in September), since she's been with her boyfriend longer. Then again, I know I've heard her say stuff about not getting married while she's in school or something, which seems kinda stupid to me, but that's just my opinion.

Anyway, that's the news. My sister's getting married, which is awesome, and I think I'm too old to be single--not that I can do anything about it right now, since I don't know any guys well enough to even consider not being single with them anyway.

Something I Forgot

There was something I forgot to mention after that one time I went to Institute a couple weeks ago. Sister C. handed out copies of an April 2004 conference talk by Elder Oaks called, "Preparation for the Second Coming." (See earlier entry about Institute for more information about the lesson and how it might/might not tie into this.) There are a few paragraphs I'd really like to quote, and would've quoted sooner, if the article hadn't been gathering dust on my printer the whole time:

Evil that used to be localized and covered like a boil is now legalized and paraded like a banner. The most fundamental roots and bulwarks of civilization are questioned or attacked. Nations disavow their religious heritage. Marriage and family responsibilities are discarded as impediments to personal indulgence. The movies and magazines and television that shape our attitudes hare filled with stories or images that portray the children of God as predatory beasts or, at best, as trivial creations pursuing little more than personal pleasure. And too many of us accept this as entertainment.

The men and women who made epic sacrifices to combat evil regimes in the past were shaped by values that are disappearing from our public teaching. The good, the true, and the beautiful are being replaced by the no-good, the "whatever," and the valueless fodder of personal whim. Not surprisingly, many of our youth and adults are caught up in pornography, pagan piercing of body parts, self-serving pleasure pursuits, dishonest behavior, revealing attire, foul language, and degrading sexual indulgence.

An increasing number of opinion leaders and followers deny the existence of the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and revere only the gods of secularism. Many in positions of power and influence deny the right and wrong defined by divine decree. Even among those who profess to believe in right and wrong, there are "them that call evil good, and good evil" (Isaiah 5:20; 2 Nephi 15:20). Many also deny individual responsibility and practice dependence on others, seeking, like the foolish virgins, to live on borrowed substance and borrowed light.

Things I forgot to remember

Ok, I usually don't have more than one or two posts per day (if any at all), but while I was waiting to go home earlier, I thought of a few things that I hadn't even written in my journal yet, because I kept forgetting to do so.

A few months ago, we had some friends over for Sunday dinner, plus, I think, the missionaries. Dad had invited one of his friends from the temple, and we had either Gourmet, Indonesian Chicken, home-made pizza, or one of our other favorite Sunday meals.

After dinner, when everyone had gone home, I was laying in bed trying to sleep, when my dad knocks on the door of my room. I told him to come in, and he asked me what I thought about his friend from the temple.

I pretty much shrugged and said he was quiet.

Then, Dad gets into this thing about how his friend from church was looking for someone to date, and I'm thinking to myself, Since when does Dad set us up?!?

I asked him, wasn't his friend a little old for me? Dad said he was in his thirties. I'm only 23, so I told him that his friend's a little old for me.

It's not that I object to people dating other people with such large age differences, it's just not for me. Kimba's boyfriend, Scott, is 35, and they've been dating for almost 2 years now. She seems happy enough with him, so it's all good--but I wouldn't want to date someone Scott's age, and I'm a year older than Kimba is!

Why wouldn't I want to date someone that much older than I am? Well, it's something like this.

The current life expectancy of a reasonably healthy man is about two years less than that of a woman with the same basic amount of vigor, right?

I've always been taught that dating is a preparation for marriage, so I try to only date guys who I'd be interested in marrying (unless it's understood that the date is strictly between friends). Now, if I date, and end up marrying, a guy who is so much older than I am, the likelihood goes up that I'd be a widow before I was fifty. There's no way I want to spend that many of my older years alone. That's what the younger years are for--finding someone to spend the rest of your life with.

Right now (and since I started dating), I've made it a personal policy not to date anyone more than five years younger or older than I am for that very reason. In ten years or so, I might change that to no one more than ten years younger (because then, I won't be accused of robbing the cradle if I date a younger guy), and no one more than five years older. But for now, I'm sticking to my "five years on either side" rule.

But I still can't believe Dad set me up. Of all the people to set me up with anyone, Dad would not have been my guess of who would try first.